Just Keep Showing Up

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I remember one time I was in the locker room at the Y with my friend Jan. We were putting on our aikido gi (uniforms) before class. There was a little girl of about seven in the locker room with her mom, changing after a swimming class. As we put on our black belts and tied them, the girl's eyes lit up with wonder.

"You're black belts?" she asked.

"Yes, we are!" said Jan, smiling.

I guess no matter how jaded you are, when you can impress a 7-year-old, it feels really good.

As the girl and her mom left, Jan looked at me and said quietly, "...and it's not as hard as you might think. All you really have to do is keep showing up."

Of course Jan was underplaying the hard work she's done to achieve a high level of mastery. However, she made a great point. There are times when the most important thing to do is to show up.

Whether you're writing a book, running a marathon, entering a violin competition, or just trying to get through your daily life with kids, relationships and work, it can be hard to do the things that feel repetitive, boring, frustrating - especially when the results don't seem obvious. Those are the times we're most likely to give up, do something else that's more fun, more engaging, that seems to have more immediate results. It can be even harder to "show up" mentally at these times: to be present, listening and attentive.

I think it could be that the hardest part of getting the black belt, at least sometimes, was to keep on showing up.

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