Most Relaxed Smile

Recently among a group of instructors, Sensei talked about the importance of a relaxed face with a slight smile. He had each of us try it by smiling normally, and then relaxing the smile into one that is almost imperceptible.

I have written about this smile before in the post, The Mona Lisa Smile. This "tiny bud of a smile," as Thich Nhat Hanh describes it, is something Sensei taught me in 2001. He imitated the face I make when I am concentrating, making his lips like a closed purse. "Looks like an old lady!" he said. At the time I was in my early 40s and did not want to think of myself as an old lady! "Who else would tell you this?" he said, "Not even your mother!" He was right.

I've spent the last 13 years working on this smile. At first just when I am relaxed, working to get it just right. Then I worked on achieving it when I'm focused: at work, exercising, playing an instrument, practicing aikido (the hardest one).

Focusing on relaxing my face has made me notice how many musicians frown or make strange facial expressions while playing. The amazing thing is that changing your face changes the rest of your body. If I relax my face, my playing becomes more relaxed. In aikido, my technique. In yoga, I get that little bit of extra release.

Changing your face requires effort: it requires attention. It takes more than a day (or a month, or a year) to make it consistent. But I have experienced two benefits:

I am more relaxed when doing things that require effort, so I do them better.

And am putting off the day when I look like an old lady!